- Uber vs Taxis
I prefer regular taxis to Uber in NYC cause the driver and I can both treat each other like shit without worrying about getting a bad grade
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) June 16, 2015
2. Fluid Variety
When I walk down the streets of New York City I am always truly amazed at how many different kinds of spit there are.
— Paula Pell (@perlapell) April 4, 2013
3. Mmmm, delicious
New York City is so sanitized now. I remember when the Pinkberry on Saint Marks offered bodily fluids as a topping.
— Liana Maeby (@lianamaeby) October 12, 2014
4. NYC Pride
The flag of New York City should be someone with four bags opening a door with their shoulder.
— Alex Baze (@bazecraze) March 4, 2016
5. *sniff* *sniff*
"Now smell this." -New York
— Tim Siedell (@badbanana) June 10, 2015
6. Construction Confusion
https://twitter.com/michelleisawolf/status/532407921406386176
7. Lyrical honesty
♫ Hey there Delilah / What's it like in New York City? / Oh it's expensive and bad / I'm sorry to hear that ♫
— Mike Scollins (@mikescollins) April 15, 2014
8. Marketing idea…
NYC slogan idea: Come live in NYC, where you'll eat 60% of your meals standing over a sink or walking down the street.
— Ted Alexandro (@tedalexandro) May 13, 2014
9. Eye Contact!
Walking in New York I make eye contact with people's dogs more than with people.
— Kristen Schaal (@kristenschaaled) August 7, 2010
10. That’s just how we say good morning!
I know I just landed in NYC because it's not even 8 a.m. and multiple people are shouting.
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) June 14, 2015
11. Maybe if there’s ever a sequel to the Bonfire of the Vanities
Every seminal piece of writing about New York fails to mention "restaurant awnings with pictures of the food where the flash was left on."
— Daniel Kibblesmith (@kibblesmith) June 6, 2015
12. New Yorker: level Expert
https://twitter.com/amyschumer/status/10366562876
13. The City that never sleeps
Hey, New York City. It's not a competition. Go ahead and sleep a little if you get tired.
— Tim Siedell (@badbanana) August 3, 2011
14. Sexless in the City
Living in New York City: Expectations vs reality pic.twitter.com/yOc5UNcTCs
— Khanoisseur 🐶🤦🏻♂️🌎 (@Khanoisseur) January 23, 2015
15. You’ll never get that time back!
If life was like soccer, New Yorkers would have "stoppage time" added to the end of their lives for time lost on the subway.
— Hari Kondabolu (@harikondabolu) June 23, 2014
16. And they say romance is dead…
being upright spooned by a stranger on the subway is literally the only way I know how to start my day
— ellie sunakawa (@elliesunakawa) February 6, 2015
17. Make that 38.
https://twitter.com/kumailn/status/589863826935394305
18. That hot garbage smell.
Welcome to New York City! Where it smells like your toilet just did an hour of Bikram Yoga.
— Liana Maeby (@lianamaeby) June 1, 2011
19. The Arts.
https://twitter.com/maxsilvestri/status/518858642310041601
20. I do all my socializing at the laundromat
A washing machine in your apartment makes you a king in New York, or just like everyone else anywhere else.
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) March 2, 2015
21. Because Netflix.
Every time I walk down a snowy New York street in my peacoat, I trick myself into thinking I'm going to go home and start my screenplay.
— Chris Kelly (@imchriskelly) January 7, 2011
22. My bed is my sofa is my breakfast bar.
https://twitter.com/michelleisawolf/status/680122582625054721