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Elmos And Spider-Mans To Be Confined After City Approves “Apartheid” For Times Square

Joshua Saxon Joshua Saxon

Elmos in Times Square

A bizarre battle is being waged in Times Square. Costumed characters face government officials in a fight to protect their freedom to dress up as Minions and bother tourists for tips. And it looks like they just lost.

New legislation just passed that allows the New York City Department of Transportation to jam those pesky characters into a restricted area.

Inside Out Sadness stays in the circle
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The move comes after a long list of complaints about the characters, naked performers and beggars. Just recently, Spider-Man kicked a tourist’s ass because she didn’t tip.

Superheroes and villains alike spoke at a New York City council hearing last week, including Joker impersonator Keith Albahae, who was sporting a purple suit and green hair (they made him take his makeup off).

Albahae said: “It is not right, this is apartheid.”

City officials argue the pedestrian areas are becoming overrun by clowns like Keith, making it difficult for people to get around safely. So they’ve proposed something that looks like this:

Times Square artists impression
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Is this the end for these colorful characters of Times Square? Or is it just the beginning? Has no one considered the consequences of herding that many characters into one space and passing new legislation against them?

Spiderman Civil War
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It could happen…

 

Featured cover image: Huffington Post