Valentine’s day is coming up, which means it’s time for all the single people to brood over their single-ness. Here are 25 thoughts every single New Yorker has on Valentine’s day:
1. It’s just an ordinary day. No big deal.
2. Maybe I’ll go out tonight and have a date with myself.
3. Let me just check Twitter…
4. *Sees all the Valentine’s Day Content*
5. Let me just check Facebook…
6. *Sees disgustingly cute pictures of friends in relationships*
7. I think I’ll stay away from social media today.
8. And I should probably avoid the Brooklyn Bridge, Central Park, and all other romantic locations.
9. Maybe I’ll stay in tonight after all.
10. I haven’t tried that new Ben & Jerry’s vegan ice cream yet…
11. If I see any couples making out on the subway today I will smash their heads through the window.
12. And I will walk straight through all those hand-holding slow walking couples on the sidewalk.
13. Where is the LOVE statue again? I need to make sure to avoid it.
14. Maybe I’ll meet someone cute at the coffee shop.
15. *Runs into ex at the coffee shop*
16. How does this keep happening in a city of 8 million people?
18. No, don’t do that.
19. No Netflix, I don’t want to watch a romantic comedy, thank you very much.
20. This documentary looks interesting.
21. This documentary is so boring…
23. Why are all my matches in Queens?!?!?
24. Maybe I should just join Match.com.
25. Lol just kidding I’m too broke for that.
Cover photo credit: Mith Huang/Flickr