This is not an “anything goes” city. If you want to survive here, you should never do any of the following things:
1. Eat pizza from a chain restaurant
2. Try to give a cab driver directions
3. Walk over a sidewalk grate wearing a loose skirt (yes, it can happen)
4. Text while walking on a busy sidewalk
5. Walk slowly on a busy sidewalk
6. While walking shoulder to shoulder with your slow walking friends
7. Try to make small talk on the subway
8. Or even make eye contact with anyone on the subway
9. Play your music so loud that everyone else on the subway can hear it
10. Eat smelly food on the subway
11. Eat anything on the subway that’s not a bag of chips or pretzels
12. Take the G train
13. Go farther east than Bushwick
14. Leave the bar without using the bathroom
15. Try to live with your ex to save money
16. Go anywhere near Rockefeller Center between November and January
17. Go to a museum on a Sunday afternoon
18. Go to the Statue of Liberty
19. Attempt to stalk celebrities
20. Wear flip flops
21. Forget to bring a plastic bag when you walk your dog
Cover photo credit: clement127/Flickr