1. If you’re thinking about visiting New York City, don’t. It’s a terrible place.
2. All the things you see in the brochures are lies.
3. The truth is that it’s just so ugly.
3. Honestly, it’s the ugliest place you’ll ever visit it.
4. It’s worse than New Jersey.
5. Everybody is so rude.
6. Seriously, nobody is friendly.
7. It’s impossible to get around.
8. And you’ll most certainly get lost.
9. Literally every single thing is made of concrete.
10. And there is no wildlife anywhere.
11. All of the plants are plastic.
12. And the squirrels are tiny robots.
13. You will completely drain your bank account by the end of the day.
14. And most importantly, you will be bored out of your mind.
15. So
16. Freaking
17. Bored.
18. But the main reason you shouldn’t visit New York…
19. Is that the native New Yorkers hate tourists.
20. They’ll tell you lies and have you running in circles.
21. Better just go to Florida for your vacation.
Cover photo credit: Dirk Knight/Flickr